Wednesday, August 18, 2021

Family Decision Making



The Four "F's" of Family Decisions

A decision making framework outlined in The New York Times: "A Smarter Way to Make Decisions About Your Kids", July 31, 2021, Dr. Emily Oster,

Frame the Question:
(What specific question are you trying to answer)





Fact Find:
(Investigate all relevant information through multiple sources)






Final Decision:
(Set a Decision Date, Analyze all facts, family input, and family priorities and decide)





Follow Up:
(If needed, set a follow up date to revisit, review and revise if necessary)

Friday, May 21, 2021

Early Clues in Childhood


 My daughter is graduating from Law School tomorrow.  I am a proud mama for many reasons. She had a successful and rewarding career going in Washington DC but she listened to her inner voice that was urging her to make a change. She uprooted herself from the life and friends and all the experiences she had amassed in her post college years to take a leap of faith and follow her intuition where it was leading her--to study law. 

Her courage and bravery to leave the familiar and jump in to the unknown fills me with pride. And while she was in law school, she not only studied but put herself out there--becoming President of the American Constitution Society on campus and organizing some incredible events, writing opinion pieces for the campus newspaper, and even winning a few different writing prizes during her short three years.

When she was a little girl, she loved all everything to do with history. She loved learning about the Presidents.  She asked Santa for poster of them in first grade!  Her passion for history and love of learning has carried her through these three years, and almost made them look easy!  Which I know they were not.

Tomorrow we are so thankful to go to the outdoor ceremony and watch her graduate in a field she always had a passion for.  She is ready to change the world as a fair minded and compassionate lawyer--and her mother couldn't be more proud to watch it happen!

Wednesday, June 3, 2020

Children Are Not Born Racist

Young children are accepting and open.  Young children are curious and loving.  Young children are welcoming and inclusive.  Parents: Let's take our cues from them.

Friday, May 1, 2020

Parents: Your Children are Taking Notes
















I cannot write a post today, without thinking of the millions of people affected by Covid-19 and the ramifications from this pandemic.  Parents who are juggling online work, parents who are out of work, parents who are being called upon to become sole teacher, coach, cook, and care giver to children at home.  Parents who are worried about paying their bills and making ends meet in the face of the economic downturn.  Parents who are isolated from their normal support system--friends, family, grandparents, teachers, and religious leaders. And the true heroes--parents who are and have been on the frontlines, continuing to work for all of us and return home to children with worry in their hearts about bringing the dreaded illness into their own homes and back to their own family members.

These days have not been easy.  The past month and a half has changed our lives and turned our normal routines upside down.  So what is the message for parents who are dealing with all of these hardships?

Remember your children are watching.  During times of stress and disappointment: your children are watching.  When you feel and anger, fear and helplessness: your children are watching.  When you take your stress out on your husband, wife or neighbor: your children are watching.

But they also are watching when you stay positive.  When you wake up with a smile on your face.  When you help them to carry on when they are struggling.  When you make a plan and stick to it. 

Children get their cues on how to behave from you.  So if you are stressed, overwrought, angry or depressed, you can expect the same from them.  This can be your finest hour of parenting or your worst.  The choice is yours.

During times of difficulty, choose to rise above the situation.  Choose to be the parent who can smile in the face of adversity.  Choose to be the neighbor who is reaching out to comfort others.  Choose to lend a hand, or a meal or a kind word to those who have more struggles than you.  Choose to be the person who creates a feeling of warmth and calm in the midst of frustration and chaos.

You will be teaching your children such a POWERFUL message.  Everything will be fine.  Everything will eventually be normal again. And while things are not how you would like them to be, you are able to choose to make the best of it--for you, for your family, for your neighbors, for your community, and for our future!
facebook: SplashParentingPrinciples


Friday, March 27, 2020

Corona Virus = Boredom For Your Kids!






The United States is dealing with a pandemic and most of us are finding ourselves "sheltered in place".  School is cancelled and our children are home and probably for many of them, this is their first taste of boredom--in their entire lives.  Boredom can put them on a treasure hunt for creativity and inspiration.  Many children have online learning tasks, but what else can they do--when the school work is done, but they can't go hang with their friends?  Here is a list of things that might inspire your children during these unusual circumstances:

MUSIC:

  • CHALLENGE THEM TO WRITE A SONG
  • HAVE THEM LIP SYNC TO MUSIC THEY FIND ONLINE
  • ASK THEM TO PUT TOGETHER A PLAY LIST THAT IS TIED TO AN ACTIVITY--LIKE CLEANING THE HOUSE OR STUDYING OR ROAD TRIPS
  • HAVE THEM MAKE UP A DANCE TO A FAVORITE SONG AND RECORD THEM PERFORMING IT
COMMUNITY OUTREACH:
  • WRITE NOTES OR CARDS FOR NEARBY RETIREMENT CENTERS
  • COLLECT ALL THE POCKET CHANGE THEY CAN FIND AROUND YOUR HOUSE AND MAKE A DONATION TO A FOOD PANTRY
  • MAKE POSTERS OF HOPE AND KINDNESS TO DISPLAY IN YOUR WINDOWS
FAMILY CONNECTION:
  • HAVE THEM FACETIME OR SKYPE WITH AN OUT OF STATE RELATIVE
  • WRITE, DRAW OR SING A GREETING TO SENT TO A FAMILY MEMBER
  • SET UP AN ONLINE MEETING WITH COUSINS OR EXTENDED FAMILY GROUP
  • PLAY ONLINE GAMES WITH EXTENDED FAMILY MEMBERS
BAKING/COOKING
  • GIVE THEM COOK BOOKS TO READ
  • ENCOURAGE THEM TO CHOOSE A COOKING SHOW SERIES TO WATCH
  • ALLOW THEM TO BAKE SOMETHING OF THEIR CHOOSING
  • CHALLENGE THEM TO COOK AN ENTIRE DINNER FOR THE FAMILY
ART
  • FIND ART MATERIALS AND ENCOURAGE AN ART PROJECT
  • FIND ITEMS IN YOUR HOME LIKE VASES OR FLOWER POTS THAT THEY CAN PAINT OR DECORATE WITH MOSAIC ART
  • CHALLENGE THEM TO CREATE A COLLAGE FROM MAGAZINES, CATALOGUES, NEWSPAPERS
  • TAKE THE TIME TO TEACH THEM TO KNIT OR CROCHET OR SEW--OR LOOK FOR TUTORIALS ONLINE
ENVIRONMENTAL SCIENCE
  • ENCOURAGE THEM TO DO SOME YARD WORK
  • HAVE THEM PLAN A GARDEN-FOR FUTURE PLANTING
  • REPOT PLANTS
  • START A SEEDLING FROM FOOD LIKE POTATOES OR ONIONS OR AVOCADO
  • TAKE SOME CUTTINGS OF SPRING BUSHES AND FORCE THE BLOOMS INSIDE

This crazy time will come to an end, but maybe the interests your children develop during the mandated down time can blossom into a life long passion.  Every challenge is an opportunity in disguise.  Sending love and encouragement to all of the families facing these challenges right now.  Be kind and good to one another!